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Alexis Buhrman

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November 14, 2022

What are you saying “YES” to?

wooden blocks with letters that spell goals

My 2022 year in review (and what are you saying yes to?)

Summer and Fall really flew by. I feel like I blinked and it was over. The new year is right around the corner.

This year, some pretty big things happened. I challenged myself to slow down and say YES to rest, pleasure, joy, and things that light me up, with a group of friends.

Today, I’m sharing all the pretty and gritty details of my spring and summer of YES.

In the last six months, I said YES to:

  • Trips with Eric to New York, Alaska, and Georgia.
  • A week of rest and time off before we help my mom’s celebration of life.
  • Meeting my business mastermind friends in Evansville and Savannah
  • A Jura coffee machine (MAJOR upgrade and housewarming gift)
  • A move to Omaha (planned for another city and not until 2023)
  • A new offer in my business (Main Character Closet™)

It didn’t seem like a lot at the time, but when I write it down, I said YES to so many things.

But this is not a brag list. This is a “but if-I’m-being-honest” list.

Sometimes when I see people share stuff like this, I think “wow, what a great life they must have,” but the reality is that they’re probably sharing the highlights and  not the low. When you say YES to something, you are saying NO to something else. And sometimes that yes comes with work and a cost.

So, here is honestly what I thought and felt about saying YES to all the things:

The Omaha Move: It’s too much work and I’m too tired to move. I wasn’t prepared to make an offer on a house, have an offer on our house the next day and pack/move/close in 7 weeks. It was a lot. We also planned to move to the West Coast to be more in-between both families, but we decided being in driving distance of Eric’s mom would be a good idea. As I type this, there are still boxes to be unpacked, but at least my office is clean!

Finding a new doctor, a new dentist, getting utilities set up…I was not looking forward to this. I cried a handful of times from frustration (like when we couldn’t find any movers to come to North Platte, so we had to rent and load two U-Hauls ourselves and go back and forth to Omaha)…or when the U-Haul AC broke and I had three hot cats in carriers on my lap and about had a full crying meltdown. But we did it. We’re moved.

The Jura: Eric and I work from home. We have a regular boring coffee pot. We decided to price out a coffee/espresso machine since we don’t really go out for coffee. Eric found something that was amazing. We went to Williams Sonoma and tried it out. I was cheap and didn’t want to buy it. Seriously, I felt like it was too big a splurge. I am so glad Eric talked me into it. They last forever and I have suddenly turned into a coffee snob after years of drinking Folgers. Funny the things we have money hangups about…also don’t judge me about the Folgers.

My new program, Main Character Closet™: This was a big one for me, and something I’ve been sitting on (aka ignoring) for a while. I’ve been helping people with their clothes and personal style forever. For free. Most people don’t know that I went to school for fashion design and switched to graphic design because I hate sewing.

As a designer, I “dressed” brands for 20 years, helping them communicate what they wanted to say to their customers visually. I love color, patterns, texture, and how personal style can build confidence and allow for creative expression. LOVE IT!

So I said YES to creating a one-on-on, VIP day over Zoom. I’m so excited to help people find their style, audit their closets and learn how to turn their random items into finished outfits. I’m launching a beta (at a 50% off beta founders price) next week, but you can see a sneak peek of the program if you CLICK HERE.

Saying yes to all the things meant I had to say no to others.

Here’s what I said NO to:

Going back to school this semester: I went full-time for two and have a 4.0. It was too much. The point was joy and fun. But the first semester was a wreck. Eric broke his foot and had two surgeries. It was too much. The second semester, my mom passed away. I flew back and forth to Alaska and with the time difference, my sleep was a wreck. I gained weight and I’m still trying to get my insomnia back on track. My hair started falling out. School stopped being fun but I didn’t feel like I could back out once I started the semester in January. I should have said no then, but I said no now. Nobody is perfect, but we figure it out, right?

Planning my mom’s celebration of life: I couldn’t be in Alaska the month before the celebration, having been there already so much. Since my local AK family was there, I let them handle the details. I put together the arrangements when she passed in December, for our immediate family to celebrate her, but let my  other family members who had the time and were already in Alaska plan the summer celebration. This was hard because as the oldest daughter, I felt it was my responsibility. But there were people with more time who could fully arrange it, while I would have struggled and likely missed some things. So I (gratefully) let them.

A road trip to the Pacific Northwest: We planned a month-long road trip from Spokane to Medford to visit places we hoped to move. When we decided to move closer to Eric’s parents and picked Omaha, we cancelled the trip. I was disappointed because the last time we had this trip was with my mom, so I was looking forward to revisiting places we visited together in 2017. But we can go again in the future. And since it was all refundable, we decided to save that money for our trip to Ireland in May of 2023.

So this was my summer of both YES and NO. Sometimes restful, and sometimes stressful.

I share these truths because I’m nothing if not transparent.

We – women especially – need to support each other. There are women who will try to lift you up with them and there are women who will climb you like stairs to lift themselves up. If you’re living your truth, your life by example, there are women who will judge you and smile to your face while they talk behind your back and try to break you down. The sister wound is real.

Sharing the highlight reels without disclosing the low lights, to me, isn’t genuine. I find that it makes other women feel like their life is missing something, that a certain level of happiness isn’t for them, or that pleasure and joy are always easy to find and feel.

Sure, sometimes our lives ARE missing something and these highlight reels shine a light on our desire/envy/jealousy. But there are a lot of regular moments and days between the highlight reel “YES” moments.

While you might not be able to fill your days with these big YES moments, you can upgrade these regular moments to feel just as good.

As a coach, I have reconfigured my life to fill my regular, real-life days with main character moments.

I find them in using one of my favorite handmade coffee mugs, that I collect when I travel, and savoring my morning coffee. I’m not sitting in silence in for 30 minutes sipping my coffee, meditating. That’s not me. But I take 5 and just enjoy my coffee and take a minute before I’m scrolling my emails for the day.

Another main character moment for me is sitting on the couch in the evening reading a good book, even if it’s just 15-20 minutes, surrounded by cat babies. 

I sit at the table and enjoy eating my lunch and remember the years I sat at my desk at work just shoveling it into my mouth while I read emails. 

I use the good lotion. I take a bath with epsom salt. I put fun outfits together and wear clothes I love, even though they’re casual and functional since I work from home. I go for a walk. I meal prep and listen to my favorite podcasts or audiobooks. 

Main character moments are about adding more pleasure, fun and joy to your everyday, real life. It’s about upgrading your daily experiences, not just tapping into happiness a few times a year when you have a paid vacation…or on the weekend with a bottle of wine. And you don’t need a million dollars to do it.

Showing up like the main character in your life is not about being a selfish narcissist. If you’re still reading this, I can almost guarantee you’re quite the opposite. It’s about knowing that when your cup is full, you are your best self. 

When you’re your best self, that joy you feel overflows to your spouse, your kids, your friends, your family.

By saying YES you are an example to others that it is possible for them to say YES to themselves, too. And what it’s okay to say NO to.

Once you start saying yes to yourself in little ways every day, you’ll start training yourself to believe what I do: That joy is your birthright and anything is possible for you.

It’s from this place that we can make big moves because they don’t feel as big or impossible anymore.

What are you saying YES to?

What do you want to say YES to in the new year?

How can you add more main character moments to your day?

I’d love for you to reply in the comments and let me know.

If you read to the end, thanks for sticking around for this unusually long blog post.

Sending you high-fives, main character energy vibes, and permission to say YES to yourself because joy is your birthright,

Alexis

P.S. I help you say YES to yourself in the new year and create your main character life in my DIY vision and goal-setting online course, The 48-Hour Planning Retreat™.

In one weekend, it will change your damn life! And it’s only $497 (WHAT?!). To learn about it and enroll today, CLICK HERE.

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November 30, 2022

Let’s End this Painful New Year’s Resolution Cycle

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Let’s End this Painful New Year’s Resolution Cycle

@alexisbcoaching

What’s your pain threshold on a scale of 1-10?

When I was home last month, I saw many of my oldest friends.
 
We talked about real-life stuff. Stuff we've struggled with, or are currently working through.
 
From alcoholism to smoking, stress eating to relationship struggles, everything was on the table.
 
What we all have in common is that we all have our own sabotages and ways of coping with life.
 
What we don't have in common is the exact timeline for when we are willing and/or able to change them.
 
People have different pain thresholds.
 
Some people can tolerate lots of pain. They can suffer in unhappiness for years. Think of people you know who've been in miserable marriages for decades.
 
Some people, like myself, tolerate little. My threshold is low. Not because I can't handle pain, but because I want to address issues before they become a big deal and I revert back to old Alexis and deal with my shit with a pack of Virginia Slim Light 120s and a bottle of Hendricks...
 
If you are tolerating things in your life that you want to change, here are some questions you can ask yourself:
 
1. Where do you rate your pain threshold on a 1-10, 1 being low tolerance and ten being highest?
 
2. Would that rating be the same if you were in the same place a year from now?
 
3. For how long, or under what circumstances are you willing to tolerate this issue?
 
4. What do you gain out of staying in the current situation?
 
5. And lastly, what number do you think you'd need to be at to finally be driven to make a change?
 
For me, it's a 2-3, max. It depends on the situation and its pros and cons.

For example, I'm tolerating that I can't have any damn plants in my house because I have cats that are complete assholes. But, I love these assholes, so a plantless life is something I am willing to tolerate...begrudgingly...
 
You may be tolerating something, but there are some reasons that make it work for you, too. Until you decide it doesn't anymore.
 
If you're below a five on the threshold scale and want to talk about what a change might look like and how I could help you, let’s talk.
 
Whatever your thoughts or fears, change is possible, and I am here for you.
•
Follow
What’s your pain threshold on a scale of 1-10? When I was home last month, I saw many of my oldest friends. We talked about real-life stuff. Stuff we've struggled with, or are currently working through. From alcoholism to smoking, stress eating to relationship struggles, everything was on the table. What we all have in common is that we all have our own sabotages and ways of coping with life. What we don't have in common is the exact timeline for when we are willing and/or able to change them. People have different pain thresholds. Some people can tolerate lots of pain. They can suffer in unhappiness for years. Think of people you know who've been in miserable marriages for decades. Some people, like myself, tolerate little. My threshold is low. Not because I can't handle pain, but because I want to address issues before they become a big deal and I revert back to old Alexis and deal with my shit with a pack of Virginia Slim Light 120s and a bottle of Hendricks... If you are tolerating things in your life that you want to change, here are some questions you can ask yourself: 1. Where do you rate your pain threshold on a 1-10, 1 being low tolerance and ten being highest? 2. Would that rating be the same if you were in the same place a year from now? 3. For how long, or under what circumstances are you willing to tolerate this issue? 4. What do you gain out of staying in the current situation? 5. And lastly, what number do you think you'd need to be at to finally be driven to make a change? For me, it's a 2-3, max. It depends on the situation and its pros and cons. For example, I'm tolerating that I can't have any damn plants in my house because I have cats that are complete assholes. But, I love these assholes, so a plantless life is something I am willing to tolerate...begrudgingly... You may be tolerating something, but there are some reasons that make it work for you, too. Until you decide it doesn't anymore. If you're below a five on the threshold scale and want to talk about what a change might look like and how I could help you, let’s talk. Whatever your thoughts or fears, change is possible, and I am here for you.
9 months ago
View on Instagram |
1/6
The first six months of the year are officially over. WHAT?! WHERE?! HOW?! 🤣

Maybe you started 2022 with goals for the year and you're making progress. Awesome! Maybe you're feeling behind.

Maybe you didn’t give a damn about goals because, you know, America is basically on fire…

You know me. I'm all about evaluating things in a non-judgmental, curious way: what's working, what isn't, and what am I going to do about it.

If you feel like evaluating where you're at today, now could be a great time to get started.

If you haven't made the progress you hoped for at the start of the year, this could be a great opportunity to get curious about why, so you can start making shifts and changes.

If 2022 hasn't been what you hoped, that's okay. Let's focus on today and what is possible moving forward.

Where would you like to be on New Year's Eve six months from now?

Who do you hope to be?

How do you want to feel?

What do you hope would be different between then and now?

If you are ready to take action and need support, I would love to work with you.

In April, I launched a beta run for my new program. Participants spent two days with me in a virtual retreat, getting crystal clear on the life they wanted to create and their goals, LIVE in my online course, The 48-Hour Planning Retreat™.

I took feedback, refined the process, and expanded the program to provide more support, and now I'm relaunching it – my beta 2.0.

❌  If you feel stuck and you're not getting the outcomes you want, this program may be right for you.

❌  If you missed the last round and don't want to miss out this time, this program may be right for you.

❌  If you have been trying to make changes, but they're not working, and you need to shake things up and try something different, this program may be right for you.

Enrollment and space are limited because of the intimacy and personalization of the program. I have spots open now through September.

Interested in learning more? DM me or Comment “BETA” and I’ll send you an outline of what you get, and if you’re still interested, a link to book a no-pressure discovery call.

I would be honored to work with you through the rest of this year!
•
Follow
The first six months of the year are officially over. WHAT?! WHERE?! HOW?! 🤣 Maybe you started 2022 with goals for the year and you're making progress. Awesome! Maybe you're feeling behind. Maybe you didn’t give a damn about goals because, you know, America is basically on fire… You know me. I'm all about evaluating things in a non-judgmental, curious way: what's working, what isn't, and what am I going to do about it. If you feel like evaluating where you're at today, now could be a great time to get started. If you haven't made the progress you hoped for at the start of the year, this could be a great opportunity to get curious about why, so you can start making shifts and changes. If 2022 hasn't been what you hoped, that's okay. Let's focus on today and what is possible moving forward. Where would you like to be on New Year's Eve six months from now? Who do you hope to be? How do you want to feel? What do you hope would be different between then and now? If you are ready to take action and need support, I would love to work with you. In April, I launched a beta run for my new program. Participants spent two days with me in a virtual retreat, getting crystal clear on the life they wanted to create and their goals, LIVE in my online course, The 48-Hour Planning Retreat™. I took feedback, refined the process, and expanded the program to provide more support, and now I'm relaunching it – my beta 2.0. ❌ If you feel stuck and you're not getting the outcomes you want, this program may be right for you. ❌ If you missed the last round and don't want to miss out this time, this program may be right for you. ❌ If you have been trying to make changes, but they're not working, and you need to shake things up and try something different, this program may be right for you. Enrollment and space are limited because of the intimacy and personalization of the program. I have spots open now through September. Interested in learning more? DM me or Comment “BETA” and I’ll send you an outline of what you get, and if you’re still interested, a link to book a no-pressure discovery call. I would be honored to work with you through the rest of this year!
9 months ago
View on Instagram |
2/6
Jim Hopper is my boyfriend. 😘⁠
⁠
I love Stranger Things. I counted down the days to the season 4 drop, and it did not disappoint. The soundtrack was fantastic. The acting and writing were stellar.⁠
⁠
And then there was Jim Hopper.⁠
⁠
Friend, I have a mad crush on David Harbour. If Alexis has a "type," it's his role as Jim Hopper.⁠
⁠
✅ Amazing dance moves⁠
✅ 6’3” with a haaaaawwwwwtttt dad bod + cop uniform⁠
✅ Looking like a SNACK⁠
✅ Saves the damn day⁠
⁠
Hopper is the stuff my fantasies are made of. 🤣⁠
⁠
Without giving away spoilers, Hopper goes through several transformations/evolutions throughout the show.⁠
⁠
We see his backstory and how he copes with life.⁠
⁠
My therapist calls coping mechanisms "pressure valves," and I think it's a great way to describe how people cope with stress - with understanding and without judgment.⁠
⁠
Had a hard day? Pull on your personal brand of pressure valve = release pressure.⁠
⁠
For some, that's alcohol. For others, it’s online shopping, porn, gambling, or numbing out.⁠
⁠
For me, it used to be smoking.⁠
⁠
It's how I dealt with stress and trauma before I had other resources. Even as an adult, it was my go-to pressure valve.⁠
⁠
I'm talking to people right now about how they are dealing with the layers of compounding trauma from the last few years. If you’re in the U.S., it feels like there is a crisis almost daily these days.⁠
⁠
We aren't meant to deal with chronic stress, so we look for ways to cope and release the pressure of life.⁠
⁠
Everyone has a different pressure valve.⁠
⁠
Like my boyfriend, Jim Hopper, we can get through hard times.⁠
⁠
We can find ways to release the pressures that are helpful, not harmful.⁠
⁠
Wherever you are right now, and however you're coping with life, I see you.⁠
⁠
If you're over-drinking, hiding boxes of online orders from your spouse, or numbing out on social media, I accept you without judgment.⁠
⁠
And, as always, I'm here for you.⁠
⁠
Sending you high-fives and 80s vibes, ⁠
⁠
Alexis
•
Follow
Jim Hopper is my boyfriend. 😘⁠ ⁠ I love Stranger Things. I counted down the days to the season 4 drop, and it did not disappoint. The soundtrack was fantastic. The acting and writing were stellar.⁠ ⁠ And then there was Jim Hopper.⁠ ⁠ Friend, I have a mad crush on David Harbour. If Alexis has a "type," it's his role as Jim Hopper.⁠ ⁠ ✅ Amazing dance moves⁠ ✅ 6’3” with a haaaaawwwwwtttt dad bod + cop uniform⁠ ✅ Looking like a SNACK⁠ ✅ Saves the damn day⁠ ⁠ Hopper is the stuff my fantasies are made of. 🤣⁠ ⁠ Without giving away spoilers, Hopper goes through several transformations/evolutions throughout the show.⁠ ⁠ We see his backstory and how he copes with life.⁠ ⁠ My therapist calls coping mechanisms "pressure valves," and I think it's a great way to describe how people cope with stress - with understanding and without judgment.⁠ ⁠ Had a hard day? Pull on your personal brand of pressure valve = release pressure.⁠ ⁠ For some, that's alcohol. For others, it’s online shopping, porn, gambling, or numbing out.⁠ ⁠ For me, it used to be smoking.⁠ ⁠ It's how I dealt with stress and trauma before I had other resources. Even as an adult, it was my go-to pressure valve.⁠ ⁠ I'm talking to people right now about how they are dealing with the layers of compounding trauma from the last few years. If you’re in the U.S., it feels like there is a crisis almost daily these days.⁠ ⁠ We aren't meant to deal with chronic stress, so we look for ways to cope and release the pressure of life.⁠ ⁠ Everyone has a different pressure valve.⁠ ⁠ Like my boyfriend, Jim Hopper, we can get through hard times.⁠ ⁠ We can find ways to release the pressures that are helpful, not harmful.⁠ ⁠ Wherever you are right now, and however you're coping with life, I see you.⁠ ⁠ If you're over-drinking, hiding boxes of online orders from your spouse, or numbing out on social media, I accept you without judgment.⁠ ⁠ And, as always, I'm here for you.⁠ ⁠ Sending you high-fives and 80s vibes, ⁠ ⁠ Alexis
9 months ago
View on Instagram |
3/6
If you don't want to read about "lady business" and cat buttholes, keep scrolling. 🤣⁠
⁠
I have THE WORST cramps. I always have. For two days, I'm destroyed.⁠
⁠
Eric knows the drill...that THIS IS NOT A DRILL!⁠
⁠
☑️ All cats on deck!⁠
⁠
☑️ Electric hot pad at all times!⁠
⁠
☑️ Blankets!⁠
⁠
☑️ Totino's pizza!⁠
⁠
☑️ Box of tissue because I will cry for two days at literally anything. If a squirrel is playing in the front yard or we're out of Totino's pizza. TEARS! ⁠
⁠
When I worked in advertising, it was rough. It's hard to find a gap to take 2-3 days off for vacation. Certainly not every month.⁠
⁠
While I love that more and more amazing companies are providing unlimited menstrual leave, it's not a standard. But that's a rant for another day… ⁠
⁠
Taking off these couple of days every month is one of the most significant benefits of starting my own business.⁠
⁠
Other unexpected benefits are having time to see family and friends more than 1-2x a year and sleeping as long as I need.⁠
⁠
I don't have to commute. I set my schedule to start later in the morning. If I need to, I can sleep a little later.⁠
⁠
I know this is a privilege since I don't have kids. Still, it was a benefit I purposefully identified as something I wanted when I left advertising, after more than a decade of terrible insomnia. ⁠
⁠
These benefits might not be what comes to mind when you imagine what "living your best life" looks like. They don't make for insta-worthy photos!⁠
⁠
But I think these little benefits make my life richer and give me more energy for those insta-worthy goals.⁠
⁠
Traveling is great, but IDK…sleeping in with Eric and morning snuggles are pretty great, too. (And then, of course, the cats because the SECOND I wake up, their radars go off, and there they are, on the bed, butts up in my face.)⁠
⁠
Literally over here, just waking up to three cat buttholes, living my best damn life!⁠
⁠
Buttholes aside, what are some simple benefits you could enjoy in your life if you said yes to something you want?⁠
⁠
If you feel like sharing, let me know in the comments. 👇🏻⁠
⁠
Sending you high-fives, snuggle vibes, and thanks if you stayed for all the lady business and cat butthole content!
•
Follow
If you don't want to read about "lady business" and cat buttholes, keep scrolling. 🤣⁠ ⁠ I have THE WORST cramps. I always have. For two days, I'm destroyed.⁠ ⁠ Eric knows the drill...that THIS IS NOT A DRILL!⁠ ⁠ ☑️ All cats on deck!⁠ ⁠ ☑️ Electric hot pad at all times!⁠ ⁠ ☑️ Blankets!⁠ ⁠ ☑️ Totino's pizza!⁠ ⁠ ☑️ Box of tissue because I will cry for two days at literally anything. If a squirrel is playing in the front yard or we're out of Totino's pizza. TEARS! ⁠ ⁠ When I worked in advertising, it was rough. It's hard to find a gap to take 2-3 days off for vacation. Certainly not every month.⁠ ⁠ While I love that more and more amazing companies are providing unlimited menstrual leave, it's not a standard. But that's a rant for another day… ⁠ ⁠ Taking off these couple of days every month is one of the most significant benefits of starting my own business.⁠ ⁠ Other unexpected benefits are having time to see family and friends more than 1-2x a year and sleeping as long as I need.⁠ ⁠ I don't have to commute. I set my schedule to start later in the morning. If I need to, I can sleep a little later.⁠ ⁠ I know this is a privilege since I don't have kids. Still, it was a benefit I purposefully identified as something I wanted when I left advertising, after more than a decade of terrible insomnia. ⁠ ⁠ These benefits might not be what comes to mind when you imagine what "living your best life" looks like. They don't make for insta-worthy photos!⁠ ⁠ But I think these little benefits make my life richer and give me more energy for those insta-worthy goals.⁠ ⁠ Traveling is great, but IDK…sleeping in with Eric and morning snuggles are pretty great, too. (And then, of course, the cats because the SECOND I wake up, their radars go off, and there they are, on the bed, butts up in my face.)⁠ ⁠ Literally over here, just waking up to three cat buttholes, living my best damn life!⁠ ⁠ Buttholes aside, what are some simple benefits you could enjoy in your life if you said yes to something you want?⁠ ⁠ If you feel like sharing, let me know in the comments. 👇🏻⁠ ⁠ Sending you high-fives, snuggle vibes, and thanks if you stayed for all the lady business and cat butthole content!
10 months ago
View on Instagram |
4/6
When I read this quote from Brianna Wiest’s The Mountain Is You, it immediately got my attention.⁠
 ⁠
If you want a different life, it’s going to cost you your old one. While that may sound simple, it’s complex.⁠
⁠
Often we don’t love how our lives look, but we’re comfortable in them.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in an unhappy marriage because ignoring our problems is easier (and less painful) than having tough conversations, seeing a marriage counselor, or leaving.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in a job that doesn’t let us use our strengths because it’s safer than going for the job that comes with more responsibility.⁠
⁠
And some of us have dreams that get put on the “someday” list, even though for most, “someday” usually turns into “never.”⁠
⁠
We don’t read the books we shoved in the back of the bookshelf, right? They collect dust, forgotten about.⁠
⁠
The change puts us out of our comfort zone.⁠
⁠
The comfort zone is safer to stay in, it’s true.⁠
⁠
It’s a place to settle, not to thrive.⁠
⁠
When we settle, we forget how to be hungry for things we want. Better relationships. More purpose in our work. More joy and pleasure in our lives.⁠
⁠
When we forget how it FEELS to be hungry, we settle for whatever is on the table.⁠
 ⁠
I want you to get hungry because I promise you, if you’re settling, your new life is worth the cost of the old one.⁠
⁠
Once you take a bite into your new life, you will realize the cost is worth paying.⁠
⁠
What are you hungry for, friend?⁠
⁠
If this post hits a nerve and you’re interested in chatting about how I can support you in coaching - taking those “someday” goals off the dusty-ass shelf and start working toward them today, DM me or write “coaching” in the comments. I’ll send you a link to book a discovery chat.⁠
⁠
Sending you support, hugs, and a nudge - might now be a great time to spring clean your life?⁠

Alexis
When I read this quote from Brianna Wiest’s The Mountain Is You, it immediately got my attention.⁠
 ⁠
If you want a different life, it’s going to cost you your old one. While that may sound simple, it’s complex.⁠
⁠
Often we don’t love how our lives look, but we’re comfortable in them.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in an unhappy marriage because ignoring our problems is easier (and less painful) than having tough conversations, seeing a marriage counselor, or leaving.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in a job that doesn’t let us use our strengths because it’s safer than going for the job that comes with more responsibility.⁠
⁠
And some of us have dreams that get put on the “someday” list, even though for most, “someday” usually turns into “never.”⁠
⁠
We don’t read the books we shoved in the back of the bookshelf, right? They collect dust, forgotten about.⁠
⁠
The change puts us out of our comfort zone.⁠
⁠
The comfort zone is safer to stay in, it’s true.⁠
⁠
It’s a place to settle, not to thrive.⁠
⁠
When we settle, we forget how to be hungry for things we want. Better relationships. More purpose in our work. More joy and pleasure in our lives.⁠
⁠
When we forget how it FEELS to be hungry, we settle for whatever is on the table.⁠
 ⁠
I want you to get hungry because I promise you, if you’re settling, your new life is worth the cost of the old one.⁠
⁠
Once you take a bite into your new life, you will realize the cost is worth paying.⁠
⁠
What are you hungry for, friend?⁠
⁠
If this post hits a nerve and you’re interested in chatting about how I can support you in coaching - taking those “someday” goals off the dusty-ass shelf and start working toward them today, DM me or write “coaching” in the comments. I’ll send you a link to book a discovery chat.⁠
⁠
Sending you support, hugs, and a nudge - might now be a great time to spring clean your life?⁠

Alexis
When I read this quote from Brianna Wiest’s The Mountain Is You, it immediately got my attention.⁠
 ⁠
If you want a different life, it’s going to cost you your old one. While that may sound simple, it’s complex.⁠
⁠
Often we don’t love how our lives look, but we’re comfortable in them.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in an unhappy marriage because ignoring our problems is easier (and less painful) than having tough conversations, seeing a marriage counselor, or leaving.⁠
⁠
Some of us stay in a job that doesn’t let us use our strengths because it’s safer than going for the job that comes with more responsibility.⁠
⁠
And some of us have dreams that get put on the “someday” list, even though for most, “someday” usually turns into “never.”⁠
⁠
We don’t read the books we shoved in the back of the bookshelf, right? They collect dust, forgotten about.⁠
⁠
The change puts us out of our comfort zone.⁠
⁠
The comfort zone is safer to stay in, it’s true.⁠
⁠
It’s a place to settle, not to thrive.⁠
⁠
When we settle, we forget how to be hungry for things we want. Better relationships. More purpose in our work. More joy and pleasure in our lives.⁠
⁠
When we forget how it FEELS to be hungry, we settle for whatever is on the table.⁠
 ⁠
I want you to get hungry because I promise you, if you’re settling, your new life is worth the cost of the old one.⁠
⁠
Once you take a bite into your new life, you will realize the cost is worth paying.⁠
⁠
What are you hungry for, friend?⁠
⁠
If this post hits a nerve and you’re interested in chatting about how I can support you in coaching - taking those “someday” goals off the dusty-ass shelf and start working toward them today, DM me or write “coaching” in the comments. I’ll send you a link to book a discovery chat.⁠
⁠
Sending you support, hugs, and a nudge - might now be a great time to spring clean your life?⁠

Alexis
•
Follow
When I read this quote from Brianna Wiest’s The Mountain Is You, it immediately got my attention.⁠ ⁠ If you want a different life, it’s going to cost you your old one. While that may sound simple, it’s complex.⁠ ⁠ Often we don’t love how our lives look, but we’re comfortable in them.⁠ ⁠ Some of us stay in an unhappy marriage because ignoring our problems is easier (and less painful) than having tough conversations, seeing a marriage counselor, or leaving.⁠ ⁠ Some of us stay in a job that doesn’t let us use our strengths because it’s safer than going for the job that comes with more responsibility.⁠ ⁠ And some of us have dreams that get put on the “someday” list, even though for most, “someday” usually turns into “never.”⁠ ⁠ We don’t read the books we shoved in the back of the bookshelf, right? They collect dust, forgotten about.⁠ ⁠ The change puts us out of our comfort zone.⁠ ⁠ The comfort zone is safer to stay in, it’s true.⁠ ⁠ It’s a place to settle, not to thrive.⁠ ⁠ When we settle, we forget how to be hungry for things we want. Better relationships. More purpose in our work. More joy and pleasure in our lives.⁠ ⁠ When we forget how it FEELS to be hungry, we settle for whatever is on the table.⁠ ⁠ I want you to get hungry because I promise you, if you’re settling, your new life is worth the cost of the old one.⁠ ⁠ Once you take a bite into your new life, you will realize the cost is worth paying.⁠ ⁠ What are you hungry for, friend?⁠ ⁠ If this post hits a nerve and you’re interested in chatting about how I can support you in coaching - taking those “someday” goals off the dusty-ass shelf and start working toward them today, DM me or write “coaching” in the comments. I’ll send you a link to book a discovery chat.⁠ ⁠ Sending you support, hugs, and a nudge - might now be a great time to spring clean your life?⁠ Alexis
1 year ago
View on Instagram |
5/6
Are you the star of your own show or playing a supporting role?

The first time I heard of this concept, it turned me off. Right away, I thought of Mean Girls, with the star being a selfish bitch and the supporting role being the person we should aim to be. 🤣

The second time I heard it, though, it made more sense.

Being the star of the show isn’t about being the center of attention at the expense of others, but being the center of your own attention and care so you can live to your full potential.

Main characters take fantastic care of themselves and, as a result, are fantastic to be around. They encourage others to take care of themselves and lead any example.

Main characters go after what they want. That lets others see that it's possible (and the world isn’t going to fall apart) if they go after what they want, too.

Main characters don’t deny themselves joy or feel guilty for feeling it.

I know I’ve played a supporting role in my life before. If you know my loud, leopard-print-wearing ass personally, you might disagree, haha, but I wasn’t always bringing the main character energy to life.

The good lotion and fancy candles were only for special occasions. I didn’t wear things I loved because I didn’t feel thin enough to be “allowed” to wear them. 

But last night I went on a hot date with my man and wore a dress I love that fits my current body. I ate what I wanted and didn’t feel bad about it. I had fun, laughed, and flirted with Eric and it was a perfect night. I was full-on leading lady.

I wish main character me could go back and tell the past, supporting role me she is allowed to enjoy her life fully and go after what she wants.

Not when she’s earned it. Not when she’s good enough. Not when she’s smart enough.

Because she deserves it.

We all do.

It’s never too late to be the main character, friend.

What’s one area of your life you’re feeling like you’re showing up in the supporting role?

What would happen if you just showed up as the main character? What could be possible for you?

Sending you hugs, standing ovations, and permission to wear the expensive perfume you’ve been saving for a special occasion…(today is a special occasion)

Alexis
•
Follow
Are you the star of your own show or playing a supporting role? The first time I heard of this concept, it turned me off. Right away, I thought of Mean Girls, with the star being a selfish bitch and the supporting role being the person we should aim to be. 🤣 The second time I heard it, though, it made more sense. Being the star of the show isn’t about being the center of attention at the expense of others, but being the center of your own attention and care so you can live to your full potential. Main characters take fantastic care of themselves and, as a result, are fantastic to be around. They encourage others to take care of themselves and lead any example. Main characters go after what they want. That lets others see that it's possible (and the world isn’t going to fall apart) if they go after what they want, too. Main characters don’t deny themselves joy or feel guilty for feeling it. I know I’ve played a supporting role in my life before. If you know my loud, leopard-print-wearing ass personally, you might disagree, haha, but I wasn’t always bringing the main character energy to life. The good lotion and fancy candles were only for special occasions. I didn’t wear things I loved because I didn’t feel thin enough to be “allowed” to wear them. But last night I went on a hot date with my man and wore a dress I love that fits my current body. I ate what I wanted and didn’t feel bad about it. I had fun, laughed, and flirted with Eric and it was a perfect night. I was full-on leading lady. I wish main character me could go back and tell the past, supporting role me she is allowed to enjoy her life fully and go after what she wants. Not when she’s earned it. Not when she’s good enough. Not when she’s smart enough. Because she deserves it. We all do. It’s never too late to be the main character, friend. What’s one area of your life you’re feeling like you’re showing up in the supporting role? What would happen if you just showed up as the main character? What could be possible for you? Sending you hugs, standing ovations, and permission to wear the expensive perfume you’ve been saving for a special occasion…(today is a special occasion) Alexis
1 year ago
View on Instagram |
6/6
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